Hello, Real People!

English: Korean spam-like canned ham.

I’m not sure how many real people read this blog. I know a few do because I actually know them. The rest, though…I can’t be sure.

I know I get a lot of canned ham views. It’s reflected in the comments that end up in my canned ham folder. Which, by the way, I delete without really looking at, so if you leave me a comment and it never shows up on the blog, it’s a good possibility that it’s because your realness wasn’t recognized and it ended up deleted. Sorry about that.

This isn’t me complaining about my lack of page views or whatever. This is just me saying that I don’t know how many of those hits are real.

Oh, I know some of them probably are because of the search items that lead them here. I’m sure some of those people are pretty disappointed, too. I’m thinking of the ones like “Is Harris from Barney Miller gay” and “Starsky and Hutch do it” and “Jeff Samardzija girlfriend” (I wonder how many hits this entry will get from mentioning those phrases). But those looking for a recipe for pickle wraps are probably thrilled I exist.

I feel like this is also a good opportunity to point out that I don’t know what Randolph Mantooth is doing in April, I don’t know what knee brace dancing is, I have no pictures of Steve McGarrett shirtless, I don’t know what would happen if a dragon hid Easter eggs, and I’m not sure what “boobs magic revenge” is, but I’m claiming it as the name of my next band.

(Those are some of the tamer search items from the last thirty days. The people looking for porn are REALLY disappointed.)

It’s the days when I get fifty views and two of them are for the entry I posted, or I didn’t even make a post. When forty-eight of my fifty views for a day are on the “homepage/archives” then either someone is reading my life story or there’s a canned hammer in Canada working over time. That’s the only thing I can think of.

It would just be nice if I could take a head count of the real people that stop by. Like I said, I know it’s not an overwhelming number and I’m not crying for more. I appreciate the ones that I have. And this isn’t a demand for comments and an appeal for lurkers to stop lurking. I can totally relate to not feeling the urge to wave and the joy of reading without the pressure of speaking. I’d just like my numbers to tell me who the real people are and when they stop by.

So, hello, real people! Thanks for reading!

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